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A Month In A Nutshell

October 4, 2015

 

Greetings to all those who are reading this right now.

 

I highly doubt there is anybody actually  reading this now or who will read it in the near future besides my friends who iI show my website to. That's also if they decide to click on and read my blogs. However the hope is that one day there will be in fact a good amount of people who will go back and read these earlier posts, along with myself to one day reflect upon. The photos in this post represent the transparentness of my current life. I was watching a seminar by FroKnowsPhoto on youtube and said it's very important to tell people a story with your photos and life. These photos show the conditions I live in and my life at this moment. I chose to use b&w to portray my life and the direction it's in right now which is kind of weightless with lost sense of where to go. I figured since it has been officially over a month since I have been wherever an exact home that I would write a little about it and what goes on inside my mind.

 

 I have learned a few things so far being on the road, one being that I need to explore a bit more than I actually do. A lot of times I will find myself going to the same but awesome spots quite often. I think I do this because of the woke factor that single location gives me, making it very easy for me to return. There are so many beautiful places to see here in Colorado however I say to myself at times "agh I don't want to waterfall two hours" and always give an excuse waterfall settle refrigerator location that I have already experiences. I do feel though a part of this is he reliability factor of my car, I'm not too sure experiences I trust it if it needed to be pushed up a mountain or if the

to just hold up going back down. I have these thought especially after coming down a steep road from Nederland that mu beaks gave out and were not working. Thankfully my car is standard and I was able to keep the speed where I needed it to be in first gear. This still was a very uncomfortable feeling for me and gave me a bit of paranoia about trying a similar climb again.

 

Another thing learned is that my car is not comfortable to sleep in...At all. It is at the point where some night I am extremely restless and start throwing shit around my car, because this accomplishes so much you know. Weather now within the first week of October is very cool which makes sleeping in my hammock a bit of a risk, I do not want to be sick in any way with having to live life on the road like I am. I have pondered the thought of a thought  van many times thought all the good ones are states away and it is just a process to get it. Then again I am one who has written before that if you want to obtain something you need to have persistent action in a positive however, something I have been lacking to do. however I am a hypocrite I suppose, but at least I am not ignorant to that fact. It is up to me to obtain whatever it is that I want. With the van I would be comfortable and have the ability to truly sleep wherever it is that i wanted. I do like this aspect of being able to wakeup where I put myself at night; if i wanted mountains when I however up thats where i went, however and there i went. With the van I had high aspirations in my mind to add a single sink, fridge, hotplate and microwave along with solar panels for a charging/outlet hub. I feel as though this would be a really awesome and interesting way to live giving me experiences I would have never thought imaginable. With this I would also be able to go where I see fit and take my photographs all around the country with out having worry of not having a comfortable place to sleep.

 

Pause quick. A lady here at Qdoba just spilled her whole plate of food right next to me. Poor lady. Im just typing away while her and her daughter clean up ....

 

Ok, another realization I have had is that it's not cheap to eat when living in the way I have. Eating out is not cheap and everything costs all the same  within a dollar for a mean. The illusion of choice...

The van would again make it easier for me to live by giving me a place to at least cook my own simple dishes, hell with a good convection oven you can cook some pretty damn good meals. My meals have mainly consisted of panera bread and Qdoba. It is what it is though, I'm eating decent food at the least. Like I have been trying to tell myself, the quantity of money is not the focus,...  

It's still kicking my ass though for the time being.

 

Much of my time being without a home has been spend in my hammock at various places, Panera bread, Starbucks and anywhere else I can find wi-fi and an outlet to charge all of my electronics. Most of that time spent in Panera and Starbucks has been me building what it is you are on and reading now. Much thought has been taken place about what direction I want things going in "still have no idea though."

When I am not at one of those locations I could be found walking around Boulder, in the mountains on my hammock reading my books and partaking in things my mom wouldn't like. Those times were very nice and will never be forgotten even though I may not remember exactly what it was I was doing in that moment. I do have the thoughts and remembered though that those times of peace and tranquility where beneficial to my mind and thoughts as it allowed me to think deeply and constructively about myself and the life I live. Hammock time is a great time and hammock naps are even better, I look forward to future adventures with it. During this first month of being without a place it has been a time of much thought and reflection upon my life. Nothing too excited has happened. It feels as though my body and mind are going through a change. Things for the past few weeks have felt off and life has been feeling like a free fall with no direction or landing in site. I do have to stay positive though and realize this is for the better. I know it is, my pessimism gets the best of me at times. 

 

I don't mean to keep rambling, this is the lengthiest blog to date and I never want to drag on and bore you. I will be back later to talk about more descriptive events and things that I have gone through over the past few months in my travels and while here in Colorado.....

 

Until next time...

 

 

 

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